The Character House, Pt. 5: The Walls of Dialogue

Why does some dialogue sparkle with life, while other dialogue falls flatter than a pancake? The Character House reveals the answers. This model can help you build cohesive characters whose backstories influence their beliefs, goals, actions, and personality traits.

Here are the posts in this series so far:

• Pt. 1: The Character Development Tool You’ve Been Waiting For
• Pt. 2: The Backstory Basement
• Pt. 3: First Floor Fears
• Pt. 4: First Floor Goals

In this model, the walls of the house represent the character’s dialogue and actions. Just as the first floor supports the walls, fears and goals shape speech and behavior. In addition, the walls are the most visible parts of the house. Likewise, the character’s dialogue and actions are visible expressions of invisible beliefs, backstories, fears, and goals. 

Today’s post will discuss dialogue, and next week’s post will explore actions. Both components give the readers a clear idea of who the character is on the inside.

Dialogue can be one of the most fun—and most challenging—parts of fiction. Although we want to write realistic dialogue, we don’t want to include every instance of small talk about the weather. 

In future posts, I’ll describe all the details of dialogue mechanics. For now, I’m going to cover two categories of dialogue tips: developing character voices and writing the dialogue in the story.

How to Develop Character Voices

Real people speak differently from one another. They have different personalities, accents, vocabularies, areas of expertise, and so on. An English professor speaks differently from a middle schooler, and a computer scientist uses different words than a poet. Even people of the same age and background don’t have identical speaking patterns.

For these reasons, stories become more authentic when each character has a distinctive speaking voice. In his book Save the Cat!, screenwriter Blake Snyder suggests reading your dialogue while covering up the speaker tags. Each character’s dialogue should be so distinctive that you can tell who’s talking without being told. To help you achieve this lofty goal, the following tips will equip you to develop vibrant voices that brim with character. 

1. Consider the character’s background.

The Walls of Dialogue are supported by the Backstory Basement. In other words, many areas of backstory influence a character’s speaking style: 

• Age: Most of the time, toddlers don’t speak like adults, and elderly characters don’t use teenage slang. (You may find exceptions, such as a grandma who is raising her adolescent grandchildren, but this is a general rule.)
• Culture: Many cultures use specific terms. In Great Britain, a line of people is a queue, and in various parts of the United States, soft drinks are known as soda, pop, and coke.
• Education: A PhD student will generally use more complex words and sentences than a fifth grader.
• Interests: A character in a specialized discipline might think and speak in terms of that discipline. For instance, a person who enjoys logic and debating might claim that someone is being illogical or that a statement contradicts itself. These phrases can make this character’s dialogue stand out.
• Occupation: Characters’ jobs often influence their speaking patterns. An EMT may describe an injury in more technical terms than an average layperson, and a sailor might refer to left and right as port and starboard. 
• Past experiences: A character raised in a nurturing household might speak with gentleness and patience. Conversely, a character whose parents constantly argued may become conflict-averse, hesitating to voice opinions directly. 
• Personality: A blunt person might use shorter sentences and state opinions with certainty. By contrast, a soft-spoken person may use phrases such as I think and maybe.
• Time period: When writing fantasy or historical fiction, remember that some aspects of speech differ based on the time period. For example, high-class characters might use fewer contractions (don’t, can’t, etc.). Similarly, characters from the 1600s probably wouldn’t say that they’re going to hang out with their friends.
• Worldbuilding: In fantasy and sci-fi novels, characters might use terms that reflect the worldbuilding. In Water’s Break by Sophia L. Hansen, the characters use insults like minnow and eel, reflecting their undersea world. 
• Vocal quirks: Traits such as accents and speech impediments will impact dialogue, but don’t overdo it.

2. Use grammar and punctuation to your advantage.

As discussed in this helpful article, many nuts-and-bolts tools, such as word choice, punctuation, and sentence structure, can help you shape a unique character voice.

• Word choice: One character might say, “Stop it,” while another might say, “Cut it out.” A third character might say, “Cease that exasperating behavior.”
• Punctuation: Lots of periods can suggest a blunt personality: “Stop. Just stop.” Meanwhile, question marks can reveal an inquisitive nature, ellipses can show hesitation, and hyphens can indicate stuttering or nervousness. Semicolons and dashes can show an educated character presenting detailed information.
• Sentence structure and length: An excited character might use lots of run-on sentences, while a gruff character might speak in fragments or very short sentences. A scientist or detective might use long, essay-style sentences to explain clues or evidence.
• Catchphrases: In moderation, catchphrases can add humor and develop character voice at the same time. In A Time to Die by Nadine Brandes, the ally has two catchphrases: tally ho (for expressing agreement) and welks (for you’re welcome).

3. Consider the context.

Just like real people, characters will speak differently to different people in different situations. They’ll use a different tone when they’re congratulating a family member vs. when they’re trying to defend themselves in court. They’ll use different words when speaking to their best friend, their boss, and their grouchy neighbor. They’ll become more or less formal at home, at work, and on vacation.

As you write and edit your scenes, consider whether your character’s speech fits the setting, situation, and other people involved.

4. Listen to audio of a real person speaking.

You can model a character’s dialogue on the speech of a person—whether it’s a friend, family member, or movie character. As you write your character’s dialogue, you can imagine the reference’s speaking voice in your head. This tool can help you pin down the pitch, tone, rhythm, sentence structure, and other attributes of the voice. When I wrote a character with a stutter, I found YouTube videos of people with stutters that helped me write my character’s dialogue. 

It’s a good idea to blend a variety of traits from different sources. For instance, your character might have the raspy voice of your uncle, the accent of a movie character, and the enthusiasm of a friend when you get together. Just as with description, dialogue references can give your characters their own distinctive sound.

5. Pick a few distinctive traits.

When you write dialogue, you don’t have to include personality, backstory, occupation, education, interests, and catchphrases in every single line. Even when you know every detail about your character, not all of it will influence every sentence of dialogue. Instead, author Gabrielle Pollack suggests picking just a few distinctive traits and making sure those traits appear prominently in your character’s speech.

Let’s use two examples. Henry’s three most distinctive traits are that (1) he’s a soldier in the royal army, (2) he’s detail-oriented, and (3) he’s afraid of not being in control. The combination of these traits may produce a blunt and commanding voice. As a soldier, Henry prefers direct and precise communication, so he’d probably avoid phrases like maybe and I think. 

On the other hand, Ginger’s traits are that (1) she values courtesy, (2) she’s soft-spoken, and (3) she grew up taking care of younger siblings. In contrast to Henry, Ginger would speak much more gently, using terms like might and probably. Rather than barking orders, Ginger might phrase requests as questions.

Now consider these lines of dialogue. Can you tell which character said them?

• “Here. Take out the trash.”
• “Excuse me, could you please do me a favor and take out the trash?”

As you might have guessed, the first line was said by Henry; the second was said by Ginger. Both lines of dialogue convey the same information, but the tone is different because the speakers are different. Taken individually, neither of these sentences speaks volumes about backstory or occupation. But that’s okay. In conjunction with the rest of the dialogue, each line contributes to the readers’ understanding of the character. 

How to Write the Dialogue in Scenes

So you’ve developed your characters’ speaking voices based on their backstories, personalities, and quirks. But how do we apply this information? Now we’re going to explore four tips on writing strong dialogue in the story itself.

1. Keep the characters’ goals in mind.

The Walls of the Character House result from the First Floor Goals. In other words, characters’ goals influence their dialogue. If they want someone to cooperate with their plan, they might include only the most convincing details. If they want to make a good impression at a new job, they might choose their words more carefully than normal. 

Characters shouldn’t speak merely because you as the author need them to speak. Instead, characters speak because they’re trying to achieve certain goals. Their dialogue should reflect these goals, rather than serving only to convey information to the audience.

2. Incorporate conflict into dialogue.

When one character wants A, and another character wants B, but these goals clash, what happens? Conflict.

Just as dialogue should reflect individual goals, conversations should reveal conflict between characters. In The Secret Investigator of Astor Street by Stephanie Morrill, Piper interviews numerous suspects as she investigates a suspicious death. Her goal is to find information, but not everyone wants to give it to her (conflict). 

However, not every conversation must be an argument. Sometimes characters must discuss a shared problem, such as the king’s harsh policies or an upcoming battle. In other scenes, characters may debate the best method to achieve a goal or complete a mission. In all these cases, characters on the same side face the conflict of an external goal, which propels their dialogue.

3. Make use of subtext.

Subtext refers to an unspoken meaning, which may contradict the spoken words. To use a simple example, suppose a character steps outside in mid-April to find five inches of snow on the ground. He says, “What lovely spring weather we’re having!” His actual meaning is, “I can’t believe it snowed in the middle of April.” This meaning is subtext because it’s unspoken, hidden beneath the spoken sarcasm. 

Characters usually won’t explain their deepest emotions, desires, or fears in their dialogue. Instead, they might hide the truth, omit information, put on a facade, or dance around their true feelings. Their conversation might be a cover for what they’re really discussing. In The Geography of Lost Things by Jessica Brody, Ali and her ex-boyfriend, Nico, have a conversation that, on the surface, seems to be about an antique stick-shift car. But on a deeper level, their discussion is clearly about their broken relationship. 

Here are some more examples. Two characters who just had an argument might be stiffly polite with each other, give backhanded compliments, or behave passive-aggressively. A character who desires the approval of her critical father probably won’t directly say, “I really want your approval, and it hurts when you criticize me.” This on-the-nose dialogue lacks subtlety and feels forced. Instead, she might mutter statements like, “Fine, I’ll just work all weekend. Then I can live up to your impossible standards.” This dialogue reflects her feelings without directly stating them.

In emotionally complicated situations, the characters might not always know what they’re feeling, so it’s better to have them say too little than too much. When you master subtext, your dialogue will take on an additional layer of complexity. 

4. Give your dialogue an emotional flavor.

Janet Burroway and her colleagues explain that dialogue is more compelling when the word choice conveys the character’s emotions. For example: 

• Neutral: “I’m going to the store this afternoon.”
• Positive: “I can’t wait to head to the store and pick up my new computer!”
• Negative: “Ugh, my mom’s making me go grocery shopping again.”

Usually, your dialogue should carry either a positive or negative tone, not a neutral one. The word choice should convey the character’s emotions so clearly that you don’t have to explain them in the narration. Notice that no adverbs are necessary to show that the positive character is happy and the negative character is annoyed. When the dialogue expresses clear emotions about a situation, the readers will be more likely to feel what the characters are feeling. 

Try These Practical Exercises

1. For each of your major characters, name three distinctive traits that impact his or her dialogue. These traits may include occupation, personality traits, backstory events, accents, etc.
2. Ask each of your major characters a question, such as “What are you afraid of?” or “What’s your goal in life?” Answer the question in first person, using each character’s voice. This exercise will help you develop your characters on two levels: you’ll understand their answers to the questions and their speaking voices. 
3. Choose a simple phrase, such as “I don’t care,” and jot down how each of your characters would say it. One character might say, “Who cares?”, while another may say, “Do I look like I care?” A third character might say, “I do not see the significance of your statement.”
4. Examine a dialogue scene from your current project. What does each character want, and how does that goal affect the character’s dialogue? Do any lines feel too direct? If so, try to rewrite them with subtext—the unspoken meaning of the character’s spoken words.

The Walls of Dialogue

Authentic dialogue makes a story ring true. Just as the walls of a house rest on the basement, characters’ dialogue stems from their backstory, beliefs, goals, and fears. Use punctuation, sentence structure, and real-life references to ensure that each character displays a unique speaking style. When writing the dialogue in your story, consider your characters’ conflicting goals, make use of subtext, and choose words with a clear emotional flavor. 

These tools will help you confirm that each line of dialogue brims with personality, showcases emotion, and explodes with conflict.

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Next week, we’ll discuss Actions, which are the second component of the First Floor Walls. Discover how your characters’ actions and decisions can hint to backstory, create organic conflict, and drive an outstanding plot. 

What are the defining traits of your protagonist’s dialogue? What tools do you use to make your characters sound different from each other? Feel free to share in the comments!

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• The Character House, Pt. 5: The Walls of Dialogue
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